Loo for two...

Memorial Day Weekend 2009, we headed down to Spotted Bear Campground, which is about as far as you can drive off the beaten path and still find an established campground. It's a long drive down the Hungry Horse Reservoir, but it's beautiful. We stopped about half way to stretch our legs and use the privy.

I walked over to the pit toilets and opened the door. I just about got my pants down to my knees when I heard crazy scurrying, scratching and moving. I let out a shriek and was out the door before I even had my pants pulled all the way back up. What if it had been a BEAR???

I caught the culprit on film once I had emptied my bladder (behind a tree and thankfully not on the floor of the pit toilet) and retrieved my camera. Privies can be home to numerous small creatures...but this was the first time I had actually been startled by one and not known it was there.

rawr

Killer squirrel. I just know it.

The makeshift privy...

Sometimes a privy is what you make of it. In the case of our family, we have a two year old that "when she needs to go, she needs to go NOW." We discovered that it's easiest to throw her Pink Princess Training Potty (PPTP) in the car so we always are sure to have a privy for her, no matter where we are. She's been trained since Christmas but better safe than sorry, right?

So the inauguration of the PPTP in the wilderness happened on Mother's Day of 2011. That is when my beautiful little girl looked at me, in the middle of nowhere, and said "Momma. I gotta go poop."

That is how she ended up pooping on the side of the road in Polebridge. All while rocking the cute little sundress and LL Bean Puddlestompers. She's got her own style, yo.

Princess Potty! Yea!

lwav: the toddler version.

Ultimate in privacy...

Sometimes it is difficult to find privacy on the trail. Bushes aren't tall enough, trees aren't wide enough, too many members of the opposite sex are scouring the nearby land for firewood. Any number of factors can contribute to your need to hike another 5 miles with orange trowel in hand to find the perfect place to do your business.

But nothing...nothing, I say...says privacy like the privy at Wise Shelter on the Appalachian Trail in Virginia. This is about 20 yards off the trail. A pit toilet.  On a platform. Up four stairs. With no walls. No coverage. No curtain. Ladies and gentlemen, please check your modesty at the trailhead and proceed to the highest point for some pubic public humiliation.

On a pedestal. 

My memory is a little foggy, but I'm pretty sure that big billboard says something like "HEY! CHECK OUT THIS HIKER! SHE'S TAKING A DUMP ON A STAGE!"

And yes...I used it.

Not your Momma's privy...

It was a miserable weekend on the Quehanna Trail in Pennsylvania. We literally experienced all four seasons in less than 24 hours. It was cold and we were wet, tired and hungry. The last night we were searching for the perfect place to camp and we finally found it. Over a little bank and next to a creek. The most unexpected bit of happiness shined upon us as we stealth camped in the backcountry...in the wilds...in the back yard of some poor hunter who was out of town.

This privy was a most welcome sight and most importantly, it was unlocked and it had toilet paper. We were desperate. The trailgaritas and bouncing booze had really taken a toll. We needed this reprieve. We needed this privy to save us from ourselves.

An oasis.

How do you show gratitude to the owners? We thought a nice lilac seat cover and lavender candle would be delightful in this privy. A return trip to this location would be necessary to achieve this. That meant at some point, someone in this group would need to return to the scene of the crime.

It's a gazebo, no...it's a privy!

Occasionally the charm of a privy comes from it's unusual looks. An example of that is the Cloudland Privy at the Thistle Hill Shelter on the Appalachian Trail in Vermont. It is essentially a gazebo, which offers not a lot of privacy but does make for good ventilation. It has even had the honor of being photographed for National Geographic magazine.

It holds the name of the original shelter where it was housed but has since moved on. My friend, MsKB, allowed me this action shot of the Cloudland Privy in use.

Hex on you!

Swiftcurrent Lookout...

Another fire lookout, but this one is in Glacier National Park. Swiftcurrent Lookout can be accessed by hiking from Many Glacier up to Swiftcurrent Pass and then up the spur to the lookout. It is active and manned during fire season. It is a gorgeous hike. 

I truly do not have much to add to these pictures because sometimes, no explanation is needed. It didn't even stink!

Swiftcurrent Privy from the side.

And one of my favorite views from a loo:

Looking out over the Western edge of GNP.

The pot at the end of the rainbow...

On the top of a mountain in the Northwest portion of Montana, up the bumpy North Fork Road, past Polebridge and every other piece of civilization, you will find one of my favorite places on Earth. Hornet Lookout. Hornet Lookout is an old firetower that is now rented by the Forest Service for folks who wish to stay the night. This one is special to me because it is one of the places that my boyfriend (now husband) took me on my first trip to Montana. We had spent some time hiking in Glacier National Park...but Hornet Lookout was special. It was remote and quiet and beautiful.

And the minute we set foot in the clearing of the lookout on top of that mountain...all hell broke loose. A storm blew in with wind, sleet, rain and thunder. We sat alone in a 12x12 foot structure with windows on all sides and admired what went on outside. It blew over soon enough...and against the dark skies, we were presented with the brightest double rainbow I have ever seen in my life.

Two perfect arcs of gleaming colors against the dark gray of the stormy skies...it led to one of my favorite privy moments. The "pot" at the end of the rainbow:

The "pot" at the end of the rainbow.

When the rainbow was gone and the dark skies cleared, I ventured down to the privy. I was pleasantly surprised to find that this was yet another, loo with a view (lwav). Facing East and enjoying the mountains of the Eastern side of Glacier National Park.

Yeah, I took this while I was peeing. So what?

A loo with a view...

Birch Lake in the Jewel Basin is a gorgeous place and an amazing fishing spot. A trip their last summer with our little ones (both under 2 at the time) was a highlight of the late summer days. I, of course, went in search of the elusive toilet.

<-- Toilet!

Wandering up a trail into the heavier trees, the "toilet" was discovered. As open air as it was, the sheer volume of flies surrounding the pit itself was enough to send me running for a tree. The buzzing! My God! The buzzing! I had visions of sitting on the pit with hoards of angry flies hitting me in the butt. Noooo thank you. I will, however, say this: the view was beautiful. One could set in relative peace (if you were either deaf or have the ability to block out the incessant buzzing) and simply enjoy Birch Lake. Sun shining off the water, people fishing, children laughing. I'm fond of the loo's with a view and this was no exception. It could use fly tape though.

loo with a view

red privy of death

I encountered the Red Privy of Death (RPoD) at the Sassafras Gap Shelter just north of the Nantahala Outdoor Center while attempting a thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail back in 2006. It sat off to the side, about 50 yards from the shelter. Tinted red and falling apart, missing pieces did nothing for privacy in this privy. I had to investigate this curious structure more closely. It did not disappoint.

The door had a pathetic crescent moon painted on it. As I opened it, releasing a herd of green flies, the smell of every thru-hiker before me wafted out causing an immediate wrinkling of the nose. A privy set just outside a resupply area will not disappoint in stinkage because more than likely, the 7 trail miles from town have provided just enough jolting and jostling on the intestines to create a need to rid oneself of the mass quantities of town food one has consumed. The RPoD was no exception.

I marveled at the inside. The 1/2 roll of toilet paper that sat on the floor, partially shredded by a resident mouse. The spider webs in the corners, and given the fact that numerous boards were missing from the privy, it was surprisingly dark and damp inside. The board to protect your legs from falling excrement was completely missing. The toilet seat was a tiny little toddler-sized one; as big as one you would find in the loo of a sailboat. Itty bitty! My ass would not have fit on it had it been whole, which it was not. Somehow, somewhere along the line, someone had broken this tiny little seat and what was left was only half. The other half was nowhere to be found.

I stepped back, smiled and admired the RPoD before returning to my pack for my trusty orange trowel and wandering off into the woods. I've seen a lot of privies over the years, but this one will always hold a special place in my heart.